2013-01-04

So, Frank

He disappeared from my list of Facebook friends. I keep checking it, hoping I got the alphabet wrong or something.

I know, it's been troublesome. He has not been what I would have wanted or hoped for in a friend. I've often felt like the backup, the hookup, the last ditch I-don't-want-to-face-the-apartment person.

And I have resented that a lot. And I have told myself it's not true, that's it's more complicated than that.

But now that I am sitting down facing this final rejection, it's all that that comes back, and I am so incredibly sad that I wasn't good for more, that I didn't even get a good bye.
Or, as they say, I really wanted him to like me and I tried so hard to make it happen.

EDIT (later): I hate the whole anger sadness bitterness roller coaster thingy. I wish I could skip directly to nostalgic indifference. But my brain wants to go down the road of WHY CAN'T HE JUST SAY WHAT IS WRONG?

I am tired. Sad. Fine there is something wrong with me. I am not able to connect with the people who care and equally unable to entice the others. So, let's just take some pills and go to sleep.

1 comment:

  1. Hello, I just want to say that a true friend will always be there for you and love you unconditionally. If a person we consider a true friend of ours is not living up to that definition then their was only one true friend not two. Do not let this get you depressed.

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