I broke down today and ate simple sugars*. It's the first time since Tuesday last week. It all went wrong this morning. I was distracted by shopping on Amazon on the light-rail and got off at the wrong station. Because my face remained five inches from the iPhone as I walked down the platform I didn't notice until after I submitted my order.
I squinted into the distance and realized things were different.
My eyes tried to superimpose a road - my road - where there was green, green grass, and I could still 
vividly recall my station's name being announced while faced with a completely different one spelled out on the station-sign. It was a surreal wait as my mind reshaped to take in the new reality.
When I finally arrived at work I felt flustered and hungry. In the "cafe", which is a fancy name for a room with a sink and a coffee maker, I found a box with fund-raising chocolate bars. I helped myself to three, which I planned to savor, and went to my desk where I promptly ate them all.
At 4 PM, someone reminded me of a meeting and I got myself some "coffee" and the remaining two bars. I left the box for someone else to recycle. While trying to figure out why I was in the meeting, I ate them both, and left when it become obvious that the other attendees were planning on bickering over abstract concepts of project management - For Fucking Ever.
Just moments ago I finished a delicious, very thick, hot chocolate (free) and a piece of apple tart (paid for) at a cafe.
In a matter of hours I have made up for a week and a half's abstinence. I am impressed by myself.
* I am trying to figure out a way of saying I am a complex carbohydrate that's broken down into simple sugars, but I can't make it work.
I squinted into the distance and realized things were different.
My eyes tried to superimpose a road - my road - where there was green, green grass, and I could still vividly recall my station's name being announced while faced with a completely different one spelled out on the station-sign. It was a surreal wait as my mind reshaped to take in the new reality.When I finally arrived at work I felt flustered and hungry. In the "cafe", which is a fancy name for a room with a sink and a coffee maker, I found a box with fund-raising chocolate bars. I helped myself to three, which I planned to savor, and went to my desk where I promptly ate them all.
At 4 PM, someone reminded me of a meeting and I got myself some "coffee" and the remaining two bars. I left the box for someone else to recycle. While trying to figure out why I was in the meeting, I ate them both, and left when it become obvious that the other attendees were planning on bickering over abstract concepts of project management - For Fucking Ever.
Just moments ago I finished a delicious, very thick, hot chocolate (free) and a piece of apple tart (paid for) at a cafe.
In a matter of hours I have made up for a week and a half's abstinence. I am impressed by myself.
* I am trying to figure out a way of saying I am a complex carbohydrate that's broken down into simple sugars, but I can't make it work.
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