2008-11-10

Jason Mraz

Remember that concert with Jason Mraz in Santa Cruz? You must have been standing right next to me but you didn't say hello. Why was that?

I got shit-faced so I wouldn't spend the night thinking of you being there. It worked. It was only me and Jason Mraz and it was fantastic. Ted thought I made a complete ass of myself and refused to get closer than ten feet of me, but it was totally worth it.

I knew you wouldn't talk to me, so I decided not to tell you I was going. I knew if I did you'd pretend afterward that you didn't see me.

I never asked you why you didn't come up to me. I wish I had. At the time it was because, I simply knew you wouldn't. But it's so fucked up. I always thought it meant there was something wrong with me.That away from the computer somehow I was disgusting, messed up, boring, obscene, not to be associated with...

After the concert you said I must be the center of attention at parties. Oh yeah, everybody just loves the drunk chick. But secretly I was pleased, you seemed admiring.

There was that Dave Matthews concert too. I gave you my pass so you could get in for free. You said you could find someone who looked like me. I hoped you'd ask me. To me it seemed like the obvious choice. I was your friend, I had the pass, I wasn't much of a Dave Matthews fan, but I'd go for you. But you didn't. Just not good enough, I guess.

You never went, when you got the pass you asked how you were supposed to find someone who looked like me.

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