As I go to sleep I still fantasize that Frank is holding me, kissing me, loving me; that we're lying together in his bed; that I am wrapped in his arms. I fantasize about this even though it never happened. He pressed me tightly against his body during sex, he kissed me hard on the mouth, me grabbed my ass and my tits, but he never caressed. He usually never did anything that could be confused with caring. He kissed my knee once. It surprised me as I watched him do it. He'd kiss my neck and shoulders and back when he was fucking me from behind. I tried not to read too much into that.
He gave me head once. It was lovely. But it's so hard for me to come. It takes such a long time. After a while he "gave up" and we never tried that again.
I tried showing him how to use his hand, but again it takes so long for me and we never tried that again either.
I gave myself an orgasm, to his delight (I think), while he was fucking me. He said, "so you do orgasm!' I wanted it to be for him so I groaned his name. I don't know if he heard or appriciated the effort.
That was my only orgam with him. He had plenty, but he said that orgasms were just orgasms, "sometimes I wish I could fuck forever," and he did try. I suppose that's one of the things I really liked about him, how much he likes just plain vailla sex. And that he enjoyed it with me made me feel special even if I wasn't.